The Nurse's Secret Suitor Page 12

  Halfway to the Jeep, she whirled, went back in and came out a while later with a dress on, this one a bright pink number.

  Caleb scowled when it dawned on him what might really be going on here. Kate was trying to dress to impress the bandit.

  When she moved toward her door again Caleb held up his watch.

  “Fine,” she said, sinking into her Jeep’s passenger seat.

  Caleb snickered for half a block. Tia “flew” Calebina around and so thankfully didn’t hear or pay attention to the adults.

  “You’re making fun of me,” Kate said as they drove to Sully’s for breakfast before church. It was becoming Kate and Caleb’s favorite hangout. He’d miss that, too.

  He shook his head. “That’s not it. I have a sister, remember? Although she doesn’t change clothes as compulsively as you do. How do you ever conquer your laundry?”

  “I don’t. It conquers me.” She gave a wry grin.

  “One thing’s for sure. You never truly could be a superhero because you’d never be able to wear the same outfit every day.”

  She blinked hard at him. “Who said I was a superhero?”

  Caleb gulped. She had told him. But as BB, the night of the patio. Caleb clenched the wheel and grew annoyed with himself for slipping up. He needed to do this BB thing in 3D: with more delicacy, diligence and discretion.

  As she stared at him, he tried to figure out what would have led her to conclude others perceive her as a superhero. Work. That had to be it. “I see how others at EPTC look to you, Kate. It’s not hard to put two and two together.”

  She nodded. “Do you think of me that way? Super-hero-ish?”

  “In some ways, yes. But there are lots of sides to you. You don’t fit into anyone else’s mold.”

  His heartburn kicked into overdrive when he remembered another mix-up he’d made between BB and himself—she’d confided the lack of a stuffed animal to Caleb and not the bandit. Would Kate make the connection, too?

  “This convinces me you’re feeding him intel.” Kate held up the monkey. “I’m pretty sure you heard me tell Tia I’ve never had one.”

  Apparently so.

  How could he be honest without giving himself away? He’d stick with what he’d said before. “I promised I wouldn’t say.” Not a lie. He had promised that to Bri. You wouldn’t want me to go back on my word, would you?”

  She eyed him oddly but didn’t reply. At Sully’s he still felt her stare on him, and he grew nervous she might suspect. But he’d thrown enough believable red herrings at her to convince her he wasn’t the bandit.

  Once seated, she sighed resignedly. “Fine. Don’t give up info. I was just hoping if you know who he is, you could talk him into seeing me again.”

  Caleb had to bite his tongue to keep from yelling out “You’re looking at him right now!” Instead, he headed over to Sully’s breakfast buffet where he had his first experience herding a child through a buffet line. Traumatic.

  How did moms handle more than one child at a time?

  “Gonna share those chocolates? I never got my cupcakes,” Caleb said as they left Sully’s in her Jeep.

  She handed chocolates from a bag to him and Tia, then herself. “We’ll make cupcakes today after church.”

  “If the walls don’t fall in on me.”

  Kate laughed. “I hope not, since I’m sitting next to you.”

  * * *

  As they entered the lot of Under His Wings, the Eagle Point church, Kate questioned the sanity of her seating decision.

  If she walked in with Caleb and they sat together, and the bandit was here and saw, he might think she and Caleb were romantically involved and that he shouldn’t send her notes or gifts anymore. She hated the thought of losing the little surprises that had become her lifeline.

  But even though she wasn’t dating Caleb or anyone else, it suddenly occurred to her that it might be unfair to the bandit to accept those notes, and especially the presents. What if he had romantic intentions behind sending them? Was she encouraging that by not telling him she didn’t see him that way? Besides, the opportunity to nurture Caleb’s relationship with God and support his decision to attend church was more important than Kate’s hang-ups.

  As much as BB had come to mean to her, she refused to bank on a future with a fly-by-night phantom. She wanted someone stable. Someone with character.

  Someone like Caleb. It hit Kate like a grenade.

  If only he wasn’t headed overseas. Kate sighed, remembering Tia’s lament about hating the army for taking everything away. Before, she might have said her family experiences were her reason for agreeing with some of Tia’s anti-army sentiment. But there was no denying that the thought of Caleb throwing himself into danger was a factor, too.

  “Under His Wings.” Caleb peered at the sign and the Psalms verse as they walked under it. “Pretty cool name.”

  “Yeah, it’s kinda neat that both places I spend most of my time nowadays have to do with nine-one-one. EPTC and here.”

  Caleb smiled in a way that made Kate think he remembered the words in Psalms ninety-one, verses one through four.

  Tia pointed to the sign. “That was my memory verse once!”

  “Really? That whole thing? That’s pretty long.” Kate straightened Tia’s pigtail ribbons.

  “Want me to say it?” Tia stood taller.

  “Why yes, matter of fact, I would. It’s my favorite.” Kate gestured grandly for Tia to proceed with her verse.

  “‘Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust. Surely He will save you from the,’ uh, from the, um, the froggy’s stare—”

  Kate knelt eye to eye with Tia, struggling to recall the verse’s remainder. “Fowler’s snare and from deadly pestilence.”

  Caleb rested both hands on Kate’s shoulders and squeezed, hoping to impart hope by prayer as he said the rest. “‘He will cover you with his feathers and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.’”

  Kate turned and blinked up first surprise then pleasure. Tia’s eyes widened. “Awesome, Uncle C! Good job.”

  He chuckled. “Thanks. Although I’m a little rusty on some, I remember that verse well. It was also one of Mom’s favorites.”

  “I never knew that about Refuge!” Tia suddenly exclaimed. “God’s wings are only a town away!” Tia’s hands clapped over her cheeks.

  Caleb chuckled. “Actually, Refuge is a town named after God’s wings. God is everywhere at once, Tia. So no matter where you are, you can find refuge in Him.”

  “That’s so cool!”

  Kate rose and faced Caleb. She was so close his cologne made her forget what she was going to say.

  “What?” Caleb’s ears turned red but he smiled through it. She let her grin expand. “You surprise me sometimes, is all.” They walked Tia to children’s church, then entered the sanctuary. Once seated, she eyed him with respect and warm affection. “And I mean in a good way.”

  “Cave-in or not, I’ll die a happy man now. The indomitable Kate Dalton just gave me a sincere compliment.”

  “Don’t say that.” She frowned. “I don’t want you to die.” Kate hadn’t meant that to scrape out in a raw whisper.

  Caleb grasped her hand and squeezed an apology. She nodded. They settled in and listened intently to the sermon. The entire time, Kate prayed for God’s spirit to reach Caleb and cause him to respond. But by the end of the message, it was clear her heart was God’s bullseye today.

  The kids returned for worship and Caleb held Tia through the songs. He swayed with her as they sang. Tia’s hands cupped Caleb’s face frequently and other times she rested a contented, smiling cheek against his shoulder. By the time
worship was over, he’d nearly swayed and sung her to sleep.

  He’s singing to You. I know he is. Thank You so much for Your mercy toward him. I’m so glad for You that he’s coming back. I know You miss us when we stray.

  Kate fell into worship. Her smile erupted when “From the Inside Out,” the song Caleb loved so much from the other day, came from their worship leader.

  You truly are in control, Lord. Forgive me when I forget. In this storm of losing my grandpa and having to see my family break apart, You are my refuge, my safe harbor, my hiding place.

  “What did you learn in children’s church today, T?” Caleb asked as they pulled out of the church lot.

  “I learned to pray big!”

  He smiled. “You did?”

  “Yep. If your hopes don’t need God’s help to come through, then you aren’t hoping big enough. You can pray big!”

  “All right. I’ll remember that.”

  Caleb brushed Kate’s elbow with his. “What did you learn today?” He had a teasing tone, but his smile made it worth it.

  “I learned that God will use the most outrageous means to get through to us sometimes.”

  “Really? Like what?”

  “Take the bandit for instance. While I haven’t been taking the bandit seriously from a romantic standpoint, I know God is using him to keep me sane and hopeful.”

  “Really? You think so?”

  “Unequivocally, yes. His gifts are literally the lifeboat keeping me from a nervous breakdown.” Kate laughed, but did so mostly to cover up that it was true. Pathetic, but still true.

  Caleb grew so profoundly quiet, she lost the nerve to expound. Why was he subdued all of a sudden? Did he think less of her for using a fly-by-night friend as a crutch?

  Kate still wasn’t at a point where she could admit she actually needed one. Even to herself. Crutches were for broken people, right? She didn’t want to be needy or weak.

  Furthermore, she couldn’t get the nerve to admit to Caleb he was right. That she didn’t have to be strong all the time. That she just had to do the best she could with what she had at the time. She felt out of sorts, strength-wise, around Caleb. Vulnerable and increasingly self-conscious. His opinion of her mattered more than it should and in more ways than it should, considering they didn’t have a shot in the dark as a couple.

  Good thing he was leaving in two months because his presence was wreaking havoc with her hard-laid plans.

  Since Caleb no longer seemed in the mood to chat, and Tia had fallen asleep in her car seat, hugging Kate’s monkey, Kate rested her head back on her seat and prayed.

  BB truly is a blessing but I’m getting confused where Caleb’s concerned. You’re my harbor from storms; the bandit was a lighthouse, albeit a strangely decorated one. Nicely done, Lord. I don’t know that I would have responded any other way.

  Pray big. Kate smiled at Tia’s words from earlier.

  Heal the hurts trying to erase my parents’ marriage. Preserve and continue for life all the history they share. I love You. Bless Caleb, too, in whatever he’s going through. And, if it delights You, please give me hope that I’ll find someone to love someday. Someone who’ll stay.

  “I hope you don’t think less of me for sharing,” Kate whispered to Caleb, mostly because her stomach was churning to know why he’d grown so quiet.

  He pulled into Bri’s drive and cut the ignition. As she released her seat belt, Caleb’s hand covered hers. “I’ve said this before and I’ll repeat it as many times as it takes for you to believe.” He leaned close and swept her face with a tender look. “Nothing could make me think less of you. I just have a lot of junk on my mind. I didn’t mean to seem distracted.”

  “I know. You’re normally a stellar listener. Like someone else I know. So, don’t fret over it. I’m good.”

  Caleb tightened his grip on her hand. “By someone else, you mean the bandit?” He actually scowled.

  Which made her laugh. “Yeah, actually. The two of you have good listening in common. And kindness. And humor.”

  “But you’ve only actually seen him two—” His eyes widened. “Two minutes or so, right? I mean, you didn’t get a chance to talk long that one time you met, right?”

  She blushed. “Actually, we met a second time, too. He was there for me after I’d gotten some more bad news. But you’re right that we didn’t really talk for long either time. Still, he was a good listener. Two brief talks were enough to show me that. Although I do wish to see him again.” She hated that her voice went dreamy. So she nodded to Tia. “Mind carrying her in? I hurt my lower back moving furniture when I was looking for clothes this morning.”

  “Kate, I told you to ask for help when you need it. If you don’t ask for help, you can end up making things worse.”

  She knew he didn’t merely mean in a physical sense, but she chose to take him literally.

  “I’m getting a little deconditioned is all, from not being in the military and the workout regime that comes with it. I need to strength train.”

  Caleb gave her a wry look. “Yeah, that’ll solve it.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “If I have to explain it to you, Kate, we’re not as close as I thought.” He lifted Tia, conked totally out, and carried her into Bri’s cabin.

  Kate brought Tia’s dolls and her bandit gifts in, still wondering the meaning of Caleb’s words. Not close? Close to what? Each other? Him? Close to being able to show her imperfections to people? Probably all of the above.

  Was she no closer than she began?

  Kate sighed, not knowing what to do about herself.

  “Caleb, it took half my life to build these walls. It may take the other half to tear them down. Just sayin’.”

  The sad look in his eyes caused Kate a level of regret she had never experienced before. Was she really hurting those around her so deeply through her inability to be open about her fears and failures? Caleb seemed so sad at every piece of evidence that she would confide in the bandit and not in him.

  For an instant, Kate wished Caleb were him. But, thanks to stupid ranger school, that would complicate her life and her heart in ways she didn’t need. Not now.

  Not ever.

  Chapter Ten

  The only thing Caleb wanted right now was for the bandit costume to become cannon fodder. Seriously? Kate could open up to a stranger and not a friend? Still?

  Caleb fought frustration and stepped out on Bri’s side deck with a glass of lemonade. Nice day. Too nice to sit there and sulk.

  He raked a hand over his face then massaged his neck and the tightness accumulating there. He peeked in the door and caught Kate’s attention. “If you need me, call my cell. I’m going down to work on Bri’s bunkhouses for a bit.”

  “Sounds good.” Kate, looking distracted and disjoined, puttered around the kitchen. Probably getting stuff out for cupcakes for when Tia woke from her nap. Just as well.

  Kate didn’t look like she wanted company and he didn’t have the heart to engage her at the moment, thanks to the frustration of the mess he’d caused.

  Kate’s head poked out. “Can Mistletoe come with? He wiggled up a storm and scratched the door when he heard your voice.”

  Great. Another being to say goodbye to. He’d miss that dog. Not that he’d admit this to anyone, but he’d even miss the fish. It was fun to see the way Miss Jonah circled the tank, wagging her tail fin anytime she saw Tia coming with the Betta food.

  Caleb took the dog for a run so he’d be worn out as Caleb worked on the bunkhouses. It worked. After Caleb gave the dog some water, Mistletoe curled up on Caleb’s bag and slept. The run hadn’t dissolved Caleb’s restless energy, though.

  He needed to talk to Asher. Or something. Anything to get his mind and heart fully back on ranger school.<
br />
  What was the deal?

  Dad said he didn’t have what it took. He was gonna prove him wrong if it was the last thing he ever did. Final answer.

  Once outta there and overseas, he’d feel the burn and excitement again. Then Eagle Point’s draw would fade. Hopefully.

  Caleb threw himself into remodeling bunkhouses and made great progress. Afterward, he made sure his bandit costume was still hidden and that Mistletoe hadn’t wriggled it out of his rucksack. Kate had shown up there several mornings to help remodel bunkhouses this past month. He didn’t need her finding out on her own. That wouldn’t go over well.

  He wanted to be able to tell Kate himself. He recalled how excited she’d been to get the bandit’s gifts, the wistful way she’d sounded about the possibility of seeing the bandit again. Caleb experienced a twinge of annoyance at that.

  He couldn’t wait for Bri to get back so he could convince her that the time had come to tell Kate the truth. This bandit gig was beginning to get old. Not the bandit per se, just that he was actually starting to be jealous of himself.

  “Dude, I’m losing it.” He spoke into his phone to Asher’s voice mail after dialing. Finished working on remodels for now, he decided to get back and help Kate with Tia.

  Plus, there were cupcakes in the queue.

  Asher called back as Caleb headed with Mistletoe back to Bri’s cabin. “Hey, Landis. What are you losing?”

  “Mainly? My mind.”

  Asher laughed. “So what else is new?”

  “You’d be glad to know I went to church today.”

  “Seriously? What brought that about?”

  “My niece-to-be. Name’s Tia. She has me wrapped around her little finger, dude.”

  “They have a way of doing that. Levi says ya-ya for the blocks you sent. That’s toddlerese for thank you. You can’t make much, man. I feel bad that you’re spending so much coin on us.”

  “Nah. I’m good. I’ve been saving money for years.” Caleb experienced a sense of loss at not having his own child to shower love, care and goodies on. “I love getting the little guy stuff. How is he?”